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The Raj Strikes Back
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 Jaal brings cheer and succour to the beleaguered Atal Behari Vajpayee through its own surveillance reports. However, in public interest, they are placed in the public domain since Jaal does not believe in sealed envelopes to be opened by the lowest Government employee, whether in the office of the Prime Minister or the Defence Chief. Anyway, any number of fully or half baked morons have been suddenly recruited by the Information Technology Ministry to keep a 24-hour vigil on all websites and they can, if they are really worth at least a paisa of their collective worth, easily log on to this explosive report which will at one fell swoop save Vajpayee and bring all whisky-guzzling and cigar-smoking editors-in-chief to their respective knees!Nurat Paltej, an inconspicuous hack and two of his equally inconsequential and artless assistants, Adurina Lahb and Leumas Wetam were arrested by the police in New Delhi, Mumbai and Thiruvananthapuram and they are presently lodged in the world famous Tihar Jail in the Capital. According to the latest reports, they were undergoing lessons there in deep meditation, structured by no less a person than Kiran Bedi. A beaming Central Minister, who wishes to remain anonymous, told Jaal that Paltej and co were picked up from their hotel rooms three days ago and thoroughly interrogated. They are reported to have confessed they did approach senior ministers, party chiefs and senior defence officials with exaggerated accounts of their exploits and 'high connections'. The shadow Numero Uno in the Government knows for certain that the Press will crawl even if it is asked merely to bend. The modus operandi, it seems, was not varied and when asked why, they replied they have had a true measure of the IQ of the concerned persons whom they tried to con. According to the secret video and audio recordings undertaken by the persons Paltej and co approached, they invariably claimed they personally knew the Editor of the New York Times, BBC, CNN, The Times (London), Economist, Playboy and other esteemed journals. They also claimed they could easily get an exclusive interview with the dignitary involved carried in all or any of these publications. The catch came at the end - for a consideration, of course. And they were videographed with the spycams secreted behind the framed photographs of Deen Dayal Upadhyay and Syama Prasad Mookerji while accepting wads of currency notes for the promised interview in India or more salubrious climes abroad. The conversation, peppered liberally with four-lettered unmentionable, was captured on tape and would make even a newborn Punjabi baby blush, the Minister told Jaal. The Government has already informed the doddering doyens of the Fourth Estate in India of the explosive nature of the contents and warned them sternly that till the normal end to the tenure of the National Democratic Alliance Government, not a line of criticism or article or even a Letter to the Editor should appear in the 20,000-odd publications in the country or in any of the TV channels. Failing which, the 'explosive' contents would be widely disseminated thereby tarnishing the Indian Press collectively and severally, for ever to come! Jaal trembles at the thought and earnestly prays that the leading lights of journalism in the country will play along and help George Fernandes stage a comeback in four months or more, if the term of the enquiry commission is extended. RECENTLY ON JAAL: The EMail Of The Species Kandahar Ka Kaana Raja The World Is Not Enough Back To Squire One Poll Gita Where There's A Bill, There's A Wait DotComs, By The Numbers GoI-ing After Veerappan The Bore-Gush Race Hack Attack! Eee! Governance! Justice Unbound Small States, Large Stakes Con Banega Crorepati Salesman No. 1 Cat And Meows 25 Years After Paswan Goes DOTty Child's Play Toilet Paper Drought And About Boer Boar The Joke's On You The Coming Of Bill T Kannan SEND US YOUR FEEDBACK ABOUT THIS ARTICLE: ?
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