Bai, chai lana! Where shall I begin?
As you can see, we've lived in South Bombay all our life: a three-bed in Napean Sea. One has to give the children their own rooms. Not the suburbs, oh no, please. I'm sure they're very nice, but I can't imagine why anyone would want to live there. I'm told the suburbs are doing well these days, Yukta Mookhey came from there? Matunga? something with M. Mulund, that's right, Mulund. I think it was her dress that got her the title actually. Yes, this is also a Hemant. I love his work.
Yes, well, it is a nice view. We have a sea view from every room, actually. Luckily we don't get the sea air because the central airconditioning has been installed. Split ACs, of course. One of our friends has that old kind of AC: you know, the noisy one? So noisy! I can't imagine how they get any sleep. Now we have wall-to-wall. I love the bare floors, I think it's so authentic, I mean ethnic, but my husband loves wall-to-wall. So I now put my Shyam Ahujas on the wall-to-wall. It matches my crockery. I use only ceramic, I hate stainless steel. Plastic? Don't even mention it! Yes, these are only Fab India and Yamini cushions. I like to mix and match. But you know the problem is Fab India is so far. All the way in Pali Hill! I get tired just sitting in the car going all the way there. I always come back with a splitting headache. And then there are all those dirty little children who pound on the car windows. I get so depressed. My husband says I'm very sensitive. My eyes fill up with tears. But even then, if I really need anything very urgently, I do go to Fab India. My husband says I'm very brave. But what you have to do, you have to do, that's my motto in life. After all, I think good taste is so important. It shows up so easily if we cut corners, don't you think? So it's worth a few sacrifices. My husband says, don't be Penny wise, Pound foolish. I'm so amazed at his gift for finding a proverb that matches every situation.
Sometimes I think he is very philosophical, I am the practical one. He says, spend on quality, it will last. So I never go for these discount-shiscounts. And I'm so bad at bargaining. No, none of these pieces are from Oshiwara. It's so dirty there! And Chor Bazaar - yucky!! Smells so bad. And such horrible names the streets have. Mutton street, Butcher street. I really don't know why they don't change the names of those streets! Instead of making just Bombay Mumbai. Who calls it Mumbai anyway? And even the names of airports they want to change. I tell you.
But as for furniture - you know the man at the Raj? He's a little expensive, of course, but at least you don't have to get stressed bargaining. Any kind of confrontation tires me out. My husband says, we have got enough, let us spend. I think he's happy with this software boom. He never tells me much, because I can never understand. And I easily get bored. We women!! I don't think we can ever understand these issues. But I think he has made some money. He looks so happy these days. He sings those Shammi Kapoor songs. So romantic. Especially when he was younger he used to look a bit like Shammi!! Not now of course. Anyway, he tells me, we have got lots, let's spend. So I only get my children's things from London. Ever since they were newborn babies. Even their Pampers I got from abroad. And STs. Indian STs are so bad.
Last Sunday we went to the Derby. We kept betting on the horses with the fundoo names. But Sweet Chieftain won. Oh well, we only lost a few thousand luckily. Did you go to Elephanta for the art auction? Yes, we picked up an Anjolie Ela Menon. My daughter loves them so much. I think she has such good taste for her age. We also picked up a few more. My husband loves to pamper my tastes. And I love to encourage these poor artists. If we don't do it, who will? They don't even get any support from the Government, imagine. Though my artist friends tell me they wouldn't take any government help even if it was offered. It would compromise their artistic integrity. So now we have four more paintings. Of course I'll have to leave them at my friend's place or just gift them to someone, I just haven't got any more room for paintings. Even the Ooty cottage is full. And I've done our Goa place entirely in Husains. In the Khandala place I've only put up Krishen Khannas. And as for the Marwe shack - you know there's no more place. And anyway we've decided that it's too tiresome to travel in India any more. So we'll only travel abroad from now on. You can never tell, you know, the water and the bathrooms... All I ask for is a clean bathroom. I'm PARANOID about a clean bathroom and clean bedsheets. Otherwise I can be happy anywhere.
We were sitting at the Willingdon the other day. I prefer it to the Bombay Gym. So khich-pichh, that place. Here they have these sprawling lawns. And so sad, you see all these strays around the place, poor things. In fact all over Bombay. Someone should do something about it.
Yes, I love the Good Earth crockery. And CAC. Sorry? CAC? Oh - Contemporary Arts and Crafts. They are so eco-friendly. And even otherwise they're so friendly. They recognise me the moment I walk in! No, no, I'm not a celeb. But everyone gives only paper or cloth bags now. I'm involved with an activist group that campaigns against plastic bags, you know? Even the Bombay Store. I just love that place. I got a new fondue set from there last week. Haven't used it yet. I'm thinking of a fondue party, you know? Oh, but Westside is so crass, my dear. Imagine, they're actually going to the extent of having a sale! So much space, so little sense of the individual. Always, the Tatas are like this always, my husband says. Everything looks the same. All that light wood. So LMC. Too much synthetic. But I like the wine bottle racks. And of course the parking is a blessing.
Oh, I'm not political at all. I'm democratic, actually. I just think we should look after our servants. You know, I don't think the middle class matters at all in this country. I think life has definitely improved for the people in the Small Towns and the Countryside. I'm sure they have faith in the government. After all, it feels so good, after all these years, that India is still the World's Largest Democracy. I keep telling the Minister that all this country needs is Accountability. Look at all those babus. Sitting on hundreds of papers day after day. Who asks them anything? My husband says that if only we had accountability, we could rule the world. Look at all these CEOs, I tell you. Hands-on.
My house came in Inside-Out last year itself. But I'm sick of the decor now. My husband told me I can get it redone. He's such a sweetie, I tell you. Only thing is, my son has his twelfth standard board exams in March. Children get so upset by all these changes.
People take offence so easily these days. A friend got upset because I introduced her as living in Andheri. Versova, she said coldly, I live in Versova. Andheri, Versova, what's the difference, hey! I have never been there, have you? My husband gets so nervous if I say I'm going anywhere beyond Haji Ali. Even to the Willingdon he'll let me go only if I'm going in our car, if Kedar Singh is driving. Kedar Singh is our oldest driver, he's been with us for twenty years. His father was with us, too. Poor man, he got caught in the riots. He was one of those to whom they set fire. Oh, so terrible. Poor man, we gave Kedar Singh a week off at that time. And after the 93 riots my husband is more and more afraid. Such terrible things are happening. What is the country coming to! One day we might all be murdered in our beds...You know, that's why I only say Bombay. It will always be Bombay. What is all this Mumbai-Mumbai! Anyway. Bye-bye!
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