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Asking For The Moon
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 Did or didn't Neil Armstrong actually walk on the Moon? Or was it one major fabrication? The conspiracy theories abound, but for the moment let's give NASA the benefit of the doubt. Given that premise, let's consider Col Buzz Aldrin's recent statement in Colombo about tourist landings on the moon even if the Earth were to be destroyed by asteroid collissions.We're not the only ones paying heed to Aldrin asking for the moon. According to our investigative correspondent, on the surface of it, the Government of India has welcomed Col Aldrin's daring proposal to colonise the Moon. As usual a high-powered committee has been set up under (who else?) the omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent Cabinet Secretary to study ways (and not means, since anyway we do not have that kind of money in the treasury) of extending the leave travel concession facilities to the overworked Central and State Government employees to visit the satellite. But Jaal was not beguiled by this committee and asked its correspondent to dig in all the spacious political party bungalows in the Capital and come up something more than manure. Here is a summary of its findings: One common feature in all the areas was the sudden spurt in the demand for astrologers and they were flown in from Vadodara to Aizawl and from Nagercoil to Kargil (though not George Fernandes or Jaywant Lele). The next common activity was mostly of the hush hush variety. All factions in the parties suddenly took a liking for the "other factions" and vociferously nominated leaders for the moon trip. The Advani faction decided Atalji deserved rest for his knee joints on the lunar surface considering the gravity of the situation while the other faction favoured Advaniji visiting the moon before the chief executive of a neighbouring country (not Bhutan) did. Soniaji was the unanimous choice of all the members of the CWC, AICC, PCCs and CMs of all of the Congress-ruled states. However, the unanimity stopped there, of course, since every satrap tried eclipsing the other! The Trinamool Congress went one step further and nominated Jyoti Basu and the entire politbureau of the CPI(M) to be flown for the (honey) moon hoping that in their absence Kolkata would be theirs. As expected, Dr.Farooq Abdullah wanted the Hurriyat to be exposed to space travel. However the APHC retorted that all they wanted was to cross the LoC and wanted Dr Abdullah to do the moonwalk. We were was not surprised when M Karunanidhi wanted Jayalalitha to take off while she vowed she would banish him forever to the moon. In Mumbai, Ratan Tata wanted the Ambanis to go there while Ambani wished that the Thapars would not say no to the porposal. Azim Premji and Narayanamurthy nominated each other while Dewang Mehta did a moondance over the possibility of a new source for e-commerce. As usual Rahul Bajaj expected the entire FICCI, CII and ASSOCHAM would be thrilled to hold their seminars on the other side of the moon so as to rival Davos. The people of Kutch wanted Keshubhai Patel and his entire Cabinet to migrate to the moon where they could sanction as many high-rise building as they wanted with or without precautions against moonquakes. The much-maligned common man of RK Laxman was clear in his mind in that he wanted all the politicos and non-tax paying corporate dadas to shift forthwith so that he can start all over again from where his ancient Indus Valley cousin left off. In an exclusive interview to Jaal, Col Aldrin confided that if only he had foreseen this reaction to his remarks he would have flown directly from Maldives to someplace else, Even back to the Moon! RECENTLY ON JAAL: Excise Excise Bush Speechless The Moron's Hack Miss Whirl Chatterbox 6 Chatterbox 5 Chatterbox 4 Chatterbox 3 Chatterbox 2 Chatterbox 1 Cloud Nine The Son Always Shines Glam Slam Autonomy Retort The Sri Lankan Mulberry Bush Take The Green Quiz A Tiger By The Tail 1000000000+ Chandrachud Rereported The Second Coming Of Bill Are You A Bollywood Buff? SEND US YOUR FEEDBACK ABOUT THIS ARTICLE:
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