|
|
|
|
Election Anthrax
|
||
|
 |
 Colombo, November, 2001 - It is passe to say politics has vitiated the cricket scene, anywhere and everywhere in the cricket crazy nations. But now perhaps cricket is striking back at least in Sri Lanka.The forthcoming elections to Parliament in the tiny island nation will be dominated by the game of cricket. According to a survey conducted furtively by Jaal, the very elections have been brought about by the cricket board of Sri Lanka. The ruling alliance leaders have alleged the cricket board engineered defections from the ruling people's alliance to the opposition united national party, UNP; according to some reports, the Board is sitting on a pretty pile there and has got enough money to play around with, in politics, of course! Though this has been vehemently denied by the Board chief, there are enough 'gullible' cricket fans in the island who are prepared to accept, what the board chief would like to call, 'the canard' spread, like the anthrax bacteria, by the People's Alliance leaders. The People's Alliance, taking no chances, is fielding former captain, Arjuna Ranatunga to contest the elections, though, till last reports came in, the opposition has no cricket star to be nominated thus. Jaal, after studying the island's constitution, has come to the conclusion, cricket or no cricket, no party will be able, as usual, to take enough runs to form a stable Government. Changing the Constitution is well nigh impossible, since with the present statute, no party or coalition can muster enough, that is, two-thirds majority runs in the House. Of course, one should be ready to hear shrill cries that the Government is preparing the pitches to suit itself. The umpire will also come under fire and brimstone and it will be well nigh impossible for the poll chief to call 'no ball'; most of the time he/she (mostly it will be a he) will be announcing 'byes' and will not even listen to shouts of 'howzat'. But then everyone in the island is crazy when it comes to this appallingly manipulated game. All sections, teachers, students, workers, fighters, militants, even priests and all other sections hold over everything they are doing including fighting as long as this temporary madness lasts. Polling percentages above seventy or eighty are usual but then they are saddled with a constitution from 1978 brought into effect by the late 'old fox' JR Jayewardene. This prevents any party from winning a straightforward two-thirds majority in the House. Any change in the statute will also require a majority approval in a referundum to change even a comma in the Constitution. Only a bi-partisan co-operation can overcome this impasse, deliberately created, by the politicos of the island nation, blessed by the nature otherwise. Till then any number of innings by either side will not be able to solve the ethnic divide in the country and they will only get stumped each time. Because, what they are playing off the field is NOT cricket. RECENTLY ON JAAL: Graduate With Osama Slum Chums Dil Chahta Ha Ha Phooling All The People All The Time Achtung! Poleizi! Talks In Fool Swing Musings On Mush Amma Mia Poll Vault: The Rough Guide Delhi's Traffic Jam Being Believed Extinct Exists!! Truth Or Bare Holi Wholly Unholy Asking For The Moon Excise Excise Bush Speechless The Moron's Hack Miss Whirl Chatterbox 6 Chatterbox 5 Chatterbox 4 Chatterbox 3 Chatterbox 2 Chatterbox 1 Cloud Nine The Son Always Shines Glam Slam Autonomy Retort The Sri Lankan Mulberry Bush Take The Green Quiz A Tiger By The Tail 1000000000+ Chandrachud Rereported The Second Coming Of Bill Are You A Bollywood Buff? SEND US YOUR FEEDBACK ABOUT THIS ARTICLE:
|
| | About Us | Archives | Help | E-mail | Advertise | Legal Crap | Webmaster | | |
| Copyright © 1998-2001 Jaal™ | nEtAhOy ! |
